Hysterectomy FAQ for Family and Friends | Part 3
Q: My wife has no sexual desire anymore. It seems like she is not interested in me at all. Will she ever want to have sex again?
A: Sometimes after a hysterectomy hormone levels fall and are not adequately replaced. This may lead to a variety of vaginal problems like irritation, dryness, and pain. A woman’s libido can also be affected by her desire being low, and a loss of sensation which makes orgasm hard to achieve or non-existent. All of these issues can become quite depressing and can further hamper her desire. On our support message boards we hear concerns about this very subject on a regular basis. The ladies are desperate to get this part of their lives back also. Unless there is some nerve damage, a return to a satisfying sex life can be achieved with hormonal balance. It may simply take a little time and some added effort on your part to stir up those emotions until the both of you get through this period of hormonal stress. If the problem persists, gently encourage her to keep talking to her doctor about it, because medical help is available.
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Q: I realize this was a major surgery, but it’s been three months and my wife is STILL complaining of having pain or being extra-tired at the end of the day. I think that she just likes to whine!!!
A: Initial recovery for this surgery is 6 to 8 weeks—slightly less if she had a laparoscopic-assisted surgery. However, full recovery may take six months or more. Many women report feeling “like themselves” after three months; however, many report feeling “fully” recovered around the eight-month mark. Keep in mind that your wife has probably been feeling “out-of-sorts” for a long time. Be patient and allow her a bit more time to feel fully recovered. Encourage her to ease back into her normal activities slowly and to continue to take it easy after a more intense day. In the long run, you’ll be thankful you did so, because you will have your healthy, happy wife back.
Q: How can I support my wife through this recovery? Do you have suggestions for gifts that would put a smile on her face and give her something special to wear?
A: Most definitely yes! The Hyster Sisters Store has all sorts of wonderful merchandise. Please visit and shop at the store.
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Q: Is there a book you recommend to help my wife and me understand how to prepare for the surgery and what to expect during recovery?
A: Hyster Sisters have written one book that are helpful to women facing a hysterectomy. “What 250,000 Women Know About Hysterectomy” featuring information provided in a scheduled format for timely help.
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Q: May I post messages on the site for the purpose of letting everyone know how my wife’s surgery went?
A: Since this is a women-supporting-women website, we ask that you e-mail one of the hostesses or one of your wife’s Hyster Sisters member friends, so that, in turn, that hostess or member can share the news.
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Q: Why don’t you have a forum for just the husbands so we would have a place to ask questions?
A: HysterSisters.com is a women helping women site. We have found that women are not comfortable with men posting on the message boards. In the past, we have seen a few people attempt to offer a support site for men of women facing hysterectomies. After the men get an answer or two, they move on. They don’t stick around to help the next group of men.
While HysterSisters.com attempts to provide support for a wide variety of conditions and needs for women, we can’t be all things to all people. This website will continue to be a “women helping women” website only. We ask all men to honor this, but we invite them also to explore MisterHysterSisters.com to find answers to their questions.
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Q: Can you recommend a book for men, about what “the hysterectomy experience” entails for his wife and himself?
A: We certainly can: Our exclusive “Mister Hyster Sisters Guide” E-book, which you can learn about and purchase here.
This content was written by staff of HysterSisters.com by non-medical professionals based on discussions, resources and input from other patients for the purpose of patient-to-patient support. Reprinted with permission: Hysterectomy FAQ for Family and Friends | Part 3
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